I am sitting on my couch trying to download all of the new schema that I have developed over the past 24 hours. First and for most – I love being a woman. God made us at our core to love and serve one another. He has given us the spirit of compassion, the ability to nurture, disernment, and at the core. . . joy. Now there are times when we bite at each other and tear and nash at the weaknesses of others. There are times when we do not exhibit the qualities of a Proverbs 31 women and we turn against one another in petty bitterness. I have been guilty in getting caught up in feeling self-righteous and indignant when others crush me at the very center of my soul. I some how feel frustrated when given these circumstances and “seek the counsel” of others. I just usually want to feel entitled to my anger and hurt or frustration. But what I was reminded about grace this weekend, reminded me about extending grace in ALL circumstances.
The theme for the weekend was Infinate Grace. Over the years, I have experienced God’s grace through many situations, people and circumstances. I remember when I first understood the definition of when, after we lost Brendan, my mom telling me she was so happy that there were people in my life to give me grace. I did not know what that meant because I only saw it as forgiveness that Jesus extended to us and did not understand how other people could show me grace.
What I have come to realize is that grace is an action. It is what we do for one another because of the Love of Jesus. For so long I only thought it had to do with Jesus forgiving our sin, but it is because he died for us that we can extend it to others. It is through the things we do for our sisters and brothers to better thier life and bless them. It often comes through forgiveness, but it is not limited to it. It comes when we can meet people in their time of need right where they are. It is when we catch their tears on our shoulders and stroke their hair in comfort. It is when we forgive someone no matter what, because we know that deep down they have hurts in their past that cause them to treat us in a way that is harmful. It is shown when we bring them a dinner or babysit when needed. I get so jived up when I think about it because it it the beauty of Christ that allows us to do these things for each other. Grace is not always easy and we have to be ready to give and receive it.
I have recieved a lot of Grace over the past 4 years. There have been many prayers, words of enouragement, and wonderful things done for me. As I sat there today, I was so overwhelmed to think about all the ways I have been blessed by others. I have SO much to be thankful for and I have such gratitude to my Lord because I have been RICHLY BLESSED with friends and family that love me and accept me for who I am. I feel like I am in a place to start returning that grace back out into the world. We go through cycles in life and He builds us up to follow the path He sets before us. As I stand at the threshold of our I am only here because of the grace I have been shown. Some of this has come directly from Him and other times it came from Him through the people in my life. I can not begin to thank those who are in my life that constantly bless me. I hope you all know how much I love you and Thank God for YOU! You are a part of my story of grace and restoration and healing. Healing is work and it is a choice. I feel stronger than I have in a long time. I will always miss my son and that is ok. But now I need to move forward with an “expectant” mind. Though there was grace all around me, I got bogged down with my own self doubt and thoughts of unworthiness because of poor planning. But as I learned today, I need to move on from the past, because it does not exist anymore. There are pieces of the past that we will always have with us because we need to learn, but that does not mean we have permission to deny ourselves the dreams and desires God has for us. So i need to get out of His way and prepare my heart for what lies ahead!! See you in the future!
Yes! I have often thought of grace as “the favor” or being favored by God. The angel Gabriel came to Mary and said, “Greetings, “Favored One.” In reality we are all favored ones in God’s eyes. I quess there are circumstances that make it difficult to see or feel it, but it never goes away. If as an imperfect father can say to you, “Nothing you ever do can ever reduce or remove the esteem and love that I have for you.” Then God is so much more able to do that. Yes, you are “Favored One.” Dad.
Yeah I never thought of it as “favor”. But we are all God’s favorite that is why he sent us Jesus to stand in our place. The very definition of grace has changed for me over these past few years. It also helps us to remind ourselves of this when we need to extend grace to another human. That is the true challenge at times when we are hurt or mad. I guess that is why we pray.
I think people are beginning to realize that having others envolved in their lives is more important than first thought. Isolation does not produce individual strength. Communion, in its truest sence does. That sould be the way to grace-full living.